As a girl weight is one of the biggest issues we have to endure. We are constantly told by society that in order to be beautiful we have to be a size 2 and have not an ounce of fat on our bodies. To me, that isn’t what we should strive for. Yes, certain women are built that way they are meant to be a size 2 and that’s okay. But as for the people that aren’t built to fit into a size 2 they need to stop believing they aren’t beautiful because of it. Everyone is different. Every body isn’t going to be small and slender. I once saw a picture of different women standing next to each other and they were all the same weight, but each of their bodies appeared differently. Weight should never define who you are. I am not condoning people to be obese either. There is a HUGE difference in being fit and being skinny. Being fit means you are healthy and you are at a weight that goes along with your height and bone structure. Women who are taller tend to be more slender that is just how it is. IF you are fit that is what should matter. As for the guys that call girls fat, they are ridiculous. You shouldn’t be with someone who only loves you for your appearance. That is definitely not husband material because you are going to grow old one day and these looks will fade. Always fall in love with someone who falls in love with your heart, your personality, your character, not your weight, abs, boobs, or butt. As girls we need to stop believing that beautiful is a look. No beautiful is a personality a kind heart. Stop doing extreme workouts to obtain a thigh gap. Stop throwing up and hurting yourself so that you can feel beautiful. YOU need to know that you are already BEAUTIFUL. Stop beating yourself up because you don’t have washboard abs or double D boobs. Women need to realize that God created us just the way we are. We need to love the skin we are in and the body that He created just for us. All this plastic surgery and dieting to achieve unattainable goals needs to cease. I didn’t always use to think like this. What society always told me made me look at outwards appearances rather than personalities. I changed my mindset to realize that I am beautiful especially in Gods’ eyes. Now i see the beauty in everyone. Everyone i pass is beautiful to me. Once you learn to love yourself for what you have you will always see the beauty in yourself. Everyone should change the way they think about body image and weight. Until then we will continue to live in a society where girls and boys at young ages end their lives because they could never feel good enough for anyone. It is really saddening that almost every commercial on television or billboard we pass on the highway is about how we need to change to be beautiful. What we need to remember is that you are already beautiful and you always have been. Strive to be FIT not SKINNY.
I can’t sleep and i have been tossing and turning in my bed for the past hour so I figured why not blog? I haven’t posted in a while because a topic hasn’t crossed my mind, but tonight or really today one particular holiday keeps me awake. Valentine’s day is a wonderful day. A day to remind those you love just how much you love them—or mainly to remind THE ONE how much they mean to you and yada yada. I’m not opposed to this holiday so to speak i just hate that stores put the products out months in advance and its like a constant reminder to the single and newly single people that they will spend that year’s special holiday without someone special. It is just a lot worse for me because valentines was the day my ex asked me to be his girlfriend and this will be the first year without us being each others valentines. It really wouldn’t bother that much at all if i didn’t have a constant reminder everywhere i go that the holiday is approaching and that i will have to avoid social media that day in order to not become depressed from all the gifts others are getting from their significant others. I know i should get over this guy already but everyday i feel like i can finely breathe again and be done and away from him, something has to remind me of the good memories we shared. I can slowly feel myself starting to forgive him. I think that is what single candidates should do on Feb. 14. Start to realize that everything is for a reason and someday you will get to spend every day with the one who was made for you. Patience is a really hard thing to accomplish. Once we realize though that the wait was sooo worth it we will be thankful we decided to wait and be rewarded for not settling, So this Valentines Day i encourage all those who may be feeling down try not to make the day about not having someone else. Celebrate being single and realize that there are positives to that. We just have to see these positives. Being optimistic can make any situation a little better. Im going to try to make it that whole day without complaining or feeling sorry for myself because what good does that do it just makes me feel worse because i am drowning in my ow sorrows. Go hang out with all your single friends so that your mind isn’t on the fact that you are single and be grateful that you have these types of friends to keep you sane.
No matter how heart broken and awful my relationship was i will never regret it. I will forever be thankful for my ex. Yes, your ex hurt you or who knows maybe you were the heart breaker but either way at one point in time they were the ones to bring you so much happiness and were there to support you during the rough times of life. God is the director of our paths and He determines our plans and guides our steps. He allows all types of people into your life and they are there to help you, hurt you, love you, and most importantly teach you something. My ex yes ripped my heart to shreds but if I had the chance to do life over id still date him. He was a source of my happiness for almost 4 years, 2 years as my best friend and then 1 1/2 years as my best friend and as my boyfriend. He taught me many things. My ex was there for me when death struck my family and when my dad left and he was there when i needed to vent about things at home or the stress of school. So maybe he wasn’t the one i was supposed to remain with for the rest of my life but he definitely was a big part of my life. Without realizing it he helped me to realize that not all love lasts forever and the chances of you being that one in a million couple that marries their high school sweet heart is just that a one in a million chance. No matter if he wants to admit it or not i also taught him many things, how to be a good boyfriend. i just hope he actually takes the lessons lol. While i may still be healing and my heart may still be bandaged i may say things i don’t mean about him, but i honestly wish him the best in life. i know one day he will make a wonderful husband to the person he is meant to marry. You can’t really hate someone who you once loved dearly it just doesn’t seem plausible. You may be really hurt by them so you think you hate them but you really don’t. You hate what he or she did to you. Accepting this was really hard for me because i wanted to hate him i wanted mean and horrible things to happen to him so he would realize how much he needed me but life doesn’t work that way. I hope that one day if we run into each other on a street or in a grocery store that his life is happy and everything he hoped for i really do. I have forgiven him and i hope that he has forgiven me as well. No matter who in your life that has hurt you you must be thankful because they taught you a lesson that you needed to learn. God works in mysterious ways and that involves hurt sometimes along with the love. And honestly if it weren’t for my ex my views on certain types of men would still be dark. I would have never given certain guys a chance before him because they just weren’t “my type” but now a whole new area is opened to me. It may be hard at first but at one point you will realize that you can be thankful for the ex that hurt you in some way or another.
In this day and age getting married and staying married is a rare find. The divorce rates are at an all time high which is very sad. People get married for all the wrong reasons or they get married too quickly. A lot of times we find women complaining about the men and how they aren’t the perfect picture that we have in our minds and then when we start to despise them and the relationship ends up not working out we get frustrated because we aren’t even close to settling down, getting married, and starting a family. This morning as i checked my Facebook news feed i came across an article about women who are “keepers.” I found the list to be quite true. I believe that if we be a woman a man needs then GOD will take care of finding the perfect prince charming. Men are wired way differently than women are. No matter what you say women are the nurturers. They are born to take care of people and love harder than any other human being a.k.a. the male race. In order to be the women a man just can’t pass up or shouldn’t ever let go you must always always keep God as number one in your life. Pray often that God will change your heart. Change your heart in that you let go of all the bitterness from past failed relationships and hurts from previous men. If you punish the man that is trying to treat you right for the things another man did you will forever be unhappy. I have learned that God will send you the wrong ones so you may learn what you don’t want and definitely don’t need so that you may realize who the right one is when they come along. You must also pray for the changing of your heart to have the desire to be everything your future husband needs. As a women you have to find the balance between nagging and standing up for what you believe in. Never settle for less than what your standards are because you will always end up disappointed in the end. IF you don’t like something that a guy is doing or how he is treating you put your foot down and tell him. If you never speak your mind and always remain passive, if/when you do eventually start standing up for yourself they will not want to change because they are comfortable with the pattern you have let them fall into. Learn to speak your mind and let them know “hey i really don’t like when…” Another important quality to obtain as a women is to be BEAUTIFUL. Feel Beautiful. Every girl and women is beautiful in their own way. And i don’t just mean be beautiful on the outside, i mean the inside because that is what will matter the most. Be kind-hearted, be forgiving, be loving, be willing to give, Inside beauty is what will always remain. Outer beauty fades with age. Inner beauty will remain for a lifetime. That’s why i will always strive to fall in love with personality and kind hearts over nice abs, or height, etc. Looks should never matter that much. I mean by all means everyone i attracted to different sites. You must be attracted to you significant other but that is whole other argument. In order to be a women that a man wants to be with for the rest of his life you must love him with everything you have. I know this is a common sense thing, but i mean you must love him with all your heart. It should be God number one, spouse number 2. You must always always support him in his dreams and never tear him down on what he wants most out of life. Normally you would find someone that wants many of the same things you do. Never discourage him but encourage him. Be his number one fan and supporter through everything. Be the girl of his dreams, the one he couldn’t imagine his life without. In the end God will work it all out. IF you strive to be a woman a man can love then God will send a man into your life that you can’t live without. Until then be patient and work on yourself. In the middle of trying to make yourself better love will walk into your life when you weren’t even looking for it.
When I was a young girl i would often look up to my older cousin who had a boyfriend and wonder what being in love meant and what it felt like. I would just watch all the laughter, smiles, and tears that one person could bring to another. When she was experiencing a breakup i saw how heart broken she was and how much she cried. I didn’t quite understand how someone could be so devastated over someone who they have barely known for such a brief amount of time. I vowed to myself that i would NEVER allow myself to cry over “some boy.” and then i fell in love. I had never had a boyfriend before because that type of thing, going from one boy to the next like many of the people i went to school with did, i was shy and i had very high expectations of what i wanted out of a boyfriend. By my junior year of high school i still had never done anything not even hold a boy’s hand i started to think that i wouldn’t have a boyfriend until i entered the college chapter of my life. Well I was best friends with this boy. We were pretty close always hanging out in and out of school. I could tell he liked me but i was unsure of my feelings for him. eventually i fell for him and it all started from there. He was my first love. I was head over heels in love with him. In the beginning it was a true fairy tale as they always are. He was so so sweet. We dated for a year and a half and towards the end everything was so different, Fighting all the time, arguing, tears, childishness. When things ended of course i was devastated. Its been only a few months, and some days are a lot harder than others. Sometimes i hate being a girl because we seem to be so much more emotionally attached to people, especially in relationships, than guys ever are. This is such a sucky thing. To this day i still care for him so much and some days i really want to pick up the phone and call him, but i know it would be pointless because not only does he not care but he already has moved on in to the next relationship in his life. THIS is the hardest thing for me. It is so hard to see someone else be in love with the person you were (and probably still are if the breakup is really fresh on the heart still, like me) in love with. It is even harder to see the person who use to be in love with you be in love with someone else. That i think is one of the hardest things. Being left with so many memories and reminders everywhere you look makes it harder to move on and get over the boy who broke your heart. Even though i don’t have him on any social media websites i still am left with all the memories we had together: our song, first kiss, first date, first dance, gifts, dates, etc. I am a really emotional and sensitive person. i tend to care a lot more fore people than hey care for me. This is a true struggle because you are often disappointed. This leads into the title of this whole blog. The point of the story is, is you have to learn to pick your head up, put a smile on your face, and accept the fact that even though you weren’t in the wrong the person who deserved to apologize never will. You will forever be sad if you wait on the people who have hurt you to say sorry. Often times it will never come. God had a plan and He is sending people so you may learn from mistakes. You are being prepared for the man you are meant to be with. The man God created for you. I have to remind myself of this quite often. I have to remember that if i can be this in love with the wrong person i can’t fathom how in love and perfect the guy i am supposed to spend the rest of my life with will be like. This is hard to be patient sometimes because I want to move on and not have to be the one stuck with the heart break but all things come in due time. The storm may be rough now but in the end the sun will shine and the storm will become a memory you can be thankful for.
Not sure if this will be a positive outlet or what. i just know i have a lot on my mind and instead of posting about it on social media i’ll post a positive alternative here and give advice to go along with whatever is going on in my mind at that moment. I know that many people that i know may never read these posts and that may be a good thing for now until something is written that is worth sharing. I have been wanting to start a blog fora long time now and i often have many thoughts swimming in my brain so from now on i’ll just blog it. There will be short posts, and long posts, posts about sadness, and posts about happiness, but whatever the blog is about at that moment I just hope that someone somewhere can be encouraged by it. If anyone ever has any thoughts, questions, or comments feel free to reply ( if that is even an option on here. Lol new to wordpress.)